let me.

wrote another one. not for any one. just wrote it. im pursuing this poetry. so let me know what you think.

LET ME.

let me free
free to find the beauty inside me.
understand the hidden light that guides me.
dont create your own definition.
planning out my whole intuition.
intuition leading to retaliation.
only creating an anticipation.
CHECK MATE
the move has been made.
and dont make my emotions your personal slave.
using my tears as your Nitrous oxide.
using your laughter to demolish my pride.
but this keyboard.
this shit riii here.
allowing me to create a non physical fear.
u wish you were here.
in my thoughts.
on the tips of these very fingers.
the fingers that express what my tongue has not.
LET ME BE.
let me be the blueprint i designed.
reinacting every thought behind these brown eyes.
every urge beneath this brown skin.
let me reach you within.
pulling out every emotion.
stoping pointless motion.
creating a sttronger devotion.
because the GOD in me has respected the God in you.
and fear is not an emotion i choose.
i refuse.
refuse to be afraind.
refuse to be called out my name.
for i am amanda simone fields.
creating my own light.
i listen to those whose objective is to steer me right.
creating three choices on this very night.
LET ME FREE.
LET ME BE.
SET ME FREE.

BREAKIN OUT

i need feed back on this poem i wrote. this is the same poem that causeed my mom to remove my room door. causing her to say some things pllus more. but i didnt write it in a disrespectful tone. only wrote it because my voice felt alone. she felt i was exposing private home life. but i just wrote how i feel. so tell me what you think.



BREAKIN OUT
the powerSTRUGGLE at home is something unknown.
having me in the perdicament of asking "should i go home."
so like wayne i phone home.
love the sound of the silent dialTONE.
realizing im not the type to skip a curfew.
maybe a minute or two.
NOTthe arguementive type.
refuse to hear the wrong expect to be right.
making it hard to stay humble.
i allow my STRAIGHT&DISRSPECT to fumble.
getting told to shut up.
in my mind screaming WHATTHEFUCK.
Being aggressive.
refuse to be the aggresor.
just listenin to the stressor.
mind screaming.
volume screeching.
from the stressors preachinng.
but it is my silence that is teaching.
SOnow whos theFOOL.
love to dispute before school.
walking around with a smurk make everything kool.
butSHIIIT.....there aint nada cool.
little texts sayin have a good day in school.
got me laughin like my heart is spazin.
cant tell the real love from the fake.
so now my thoughts decided to BREAK.
OUT.
let my fingers do the typing.
expressing the uNheard in my voice.
the mistakes of my choice.
the water in my tears.
would it Be different if that man was here .
ha im going to far.
iif i was 21 i probablyHIT the bar.
drive ofF wreck the car.
HA.
HA.
I SHOUT.
shitFEELSbetter.
when you.
shh
BREAKIN OUT

09 IM BACKKKK

BIZ here, I hope yall remember me...well as we can all ssee there is a big time difference in between my last post and today. Let me explain myself, due to basketball and school(homework,test, etc.), i have been swamped with work. i did miss you guys, but because it is a new year, there will be new topics, but same ol' me. Have to give a big shout out to FaME who stayed in contact with me even though i was not blogging. So like i said its 09 and its time to go hard......


biz

wtf is a WIFEY

Now the word WIFE according to websters means a female partner in a marraige. So where does the word WIFEY from. Like i find it quite cute when you get in a realationship you fall so deep where instead of the pet names like babes, baby, pookie, boo, snookums, we go all out with hubby and wifey. like the relationship aint been more then a week and already the 1st thing you see is ?????'s WIFEY. Now my personal opinion is you either a friend, girlfriend, or a wife, and half of the people sayin wifey and hubby are not even over 18 where they are not living off there parents and can afford to support that person they are calling wifey or hubby, and that's sum shit. I was reading a friends away message and she said when a boy calls you his wifey its a clear message for someone on the side after reading that i simply broke down the word in more than the english language =] .
lets break it down
WIFE means the female partner in english :
Y means>AND in spanish
when you combine the two you have a man with a wife(AND)= WIFEY . CRAZY RIGHT

so i asked some people(hubbies aka boys) i know what qualifies a wifey and heres what i got:

-loyalty, honesty, responsibility, confidence and compassion

-they are there in and out, through right and wrong, loyal, caring

-a girl you have been with for a min and you really like

-they have to be there for their man when they are down, by their man side no matter what, defends ther man through anything, supporting no matter what, "will fuck a bitch up for them", and love them no matter what.


my follow up question was how do looks play out with a wifey, if she not a 10 but you feel her thoughts

my favorite answer was

he said, think of it like this: if u see a bumb you would never walk up to them, but not knowing that they have everything in common and are perfect for you

another one was
" they play a role but not that major" and "i would fall on the side of her thoughts"

-note those answers qualify WIFEY

maybe i asked the question wrong but .... WTF QUALIFIES A WIFE?


just to make it clear im not knocking the wifey hubby scene , but just questing the scenes purpose.(NOT THAT I HAVE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF ON MY BLOG)

always closing off with a question (today there is two)

how much do we have to know about our wifey / hubby?

&&&

If it is so easy for a teenage boy to call his teenage girl wifey, why is it so hard for the adult man to call an adult woman his WIFE?


answer &&& leave suggetions....


-biz

Changing Places

Why is it that women are able to bash men or make it seem like they are always the victim? Don't get me wrong beyonce's song "If I were a Boy" is great and has much meaning, but lets be real women we can be abusive. We are abusive because we don't allow our men to branch out and do right. Instead we look for each flaw to give more reason to scream and release a built up anger. In "If I were a Boy" she says "you don't listen to her, you don't care ghow it hurts" so lets really tap into the words. speaking from personal experienxce when the men in my life have something of importance to them I tend to drift off to thoughts about myself...so get real ... and for the fact of saying he don't care how it hurts. hurting to men and women may be two different things, but when it comes to "love" a man can love as hard as a woman. so neither sex has space to really judge the other, because who actually haves a perfect relaationship.
it is true that you need to point out the flaws to rid them. so to role play is a great tactic, but the tactic can quickly turn into an altercation. the tactic becomes an altercation where instead of being the person you approach them as urself.
i am still confused on this topic so to help me out i leave with this question

In a relationship, who really has the upperhand? and When does the upperhand become out of hand?

get at ya girl

-biz

BEATSANDFOODSTAMPS.COM

Today I came across a blog named "Beats and Food Stamps" and as I was reading it FaMe, the publisher, had wrote a blog named "Black Like Me." Now this being my first time reading his work, he had hit a hard topic, Why do black women expect black men to approach them knowing that they are going to dead the dude? Ladies we have to be real as black women or Young ladies are we expecting to much from our black men, have we created an image a perfect man not realizing the man who strives to make us happy? I can't give you all the juicy details of his blog, but ladies lets be real, how far does a relationship get if we down one another because of personality differences?
another topic he had hit was , black men being called sell outs because of the women they date. for black women to judge black men on dating is a subliminal contridiction because everyday in the street especially in NY, you see black women walking down the streets with men of all differents nationalites and races , an not once have I heard the word sell out all I seem to hear is that they are moving up in social class by dating out of their race.

My question is ...is there a difference between men dating outside their race and women dating ouside there race?

checkout FaMe's blog


-BIZ

basis

welcome readers ....this is my first blog to B.I.C. B.I.C. stands for BIZ IN CHARGE. To make it simple for you I'm BIZ and this is where I am in charge of what I say. No need for censoring from me or you, we all need somewhere to vent and just put shit on blast. Lets start now. with my blogs I am in charge, with your responses you are in charge ..by alll means say what you got to say...IT FEELS GOOD TO BE REAL

-BIZ